2 weeks and 3 days

It's late Ruey here - just submitting my blog assignment way after the due date but submitting nevertheless! I do believe it is 2 weeks and 3 days to Spout & Tim's wedding now and isn't it so beautiful that we are all talking about where we are at in terms of this special day and seeing each other again and celebrating your great day Spouty! I can't wait either!!

So where am I at?

Just in the last few days I have had the opportunity to start relaxing, unwinding and giving myself some attention after what has felt like being on the "rat wheel" of concert after concert after concert after student after student after student. It is always a fine balance doing what you love and it becoming a "good problem"!! But changes must be made for next year and that is what has been brewing in my head over the past few months and will continue to brew now I have some space to brew. I have realised that I err to the side of being a workaholic and that's something that requires addressing.

Changes? Well, what's making me realise my lack of going with the flow and working my arse off has been my path on the yoga mat and a reiki meditation I have recently adopted as part of my routine. These two things have naturally become the core of my life this year and have helped me, whilst being on the "rat wheel", feel more stable, stronger in myself and finally happy to let life lead me for awhile and evolve without me so fiercely controlling my destiny so much. This has led to a lot of lovely things.....like spontaneously giving 4 family members reiki treatments at a family reunion last weekend (they were queueing up!). A voice session with a friend turning into a reiki session and the friend paying me for it, another lady ringing for a "holistic" voice session and do I "do that sort of thing?" Well the answer is "Yes! I do!" So where am I at? I'm starting to go with the flow as much as possible, seeing what and who appears at my door and saying "yes" to trusting experiences, trusting others, welcoming more joy and ease and creating less drama in my life......

So I'm in this place of wondering what will happen in the near future if I do this and when I feel into it it feels good! :)

One thing I am sure of....sydney is going to be great! See you there on the dance floor!

Love you gals!

Ruey xxx

The Dance...

Check in - Kate

When you become a mum, you immediately gain a whole new level of respect for your own mother. I have just spent the last two days with my mum, helping me sort and pack for our big move to Canberra.

Sam has been in Adelaide and when I went to sleep last night I could not help but smile as my little house held my mum, Hannah and I. Mother, Mother and daughter sleeping under the same roof with the rain tapping at the windows.

Mother, mother and daughter laughing together as they trip over boxes, read stories, change poo explosion nappies and sort through our lives together. Hannah with her wide eyes taking in the changes, and giggles at the "peek-a-boo" games behind boxes.

Hannah rolls quickly now, flipping so fast that one second I see her and the next she is half up the "pillow wall" created to keep her safe in the packing madness.

Oh to move with a baby....

GREER - Again, a whole new respect for you, as you move with three little ones!

And AIMS crossing the oceans again with your tribe...

What joy!

My early morning feeds in semi-darkness have been the time I have begun to write my goodbye speech to the girls at the school I say goodbye to next week.

It goes something like this...

"I have always said to the girls in my production; Give 150% onstage and if you make a mistake, make it a BIG one! The audience will not even notice. Afterwards you will hear someone say "I loved the way the 40 girls spun off the stage, but that one girl who did the split leaps in the opposite direction, WOW...She was special!"

You see girls, I am going to dance my way, somewhat unexpectedly, out of Sydney and away from this great school. I am going to commit completely, with my heart, my enthusiasm and creativity to these new steps, as a mum to my 7 month old baby girl, Hannah. So girls I say to you, find what you love doing and give it your all. Don't worry if it is completely different to everyone else, just dance with all your heart! But be ready for the dance to change sometimes when you least expect it! You will learn that there are no "mistakes" in life, just different dances to relish along the way. Thanks for your humour, team work and spirit in the drama classroom. I will always carry my time here in my heart."

What an amazing time for us all!

I cannot wait to see you all and CELEBRATE the joy of Amanda and Tim's wedding. Oh I will cry for sure...tears of joy at the beautiful bride, the nervous groom, the emotions and delight of forever and I DO!

WHAT A DANCE WE ALL SHALL HAVE!

I cannot wait!

I DO! I DO! I SURE DO!

OYLOYLOYLOYLOYLOYLOYLOYLOY!

The sound in my head is like the ululating from African women - a high-pitched, tongue-waggling OY-LOY-LOY-LOY-LOY-LOY-LOY-LOY sound. Manic. Frantic. Quickquickquickquickquick!

My house is filthy, half of its contents in boxes, great armfuls being cast off into garbage bins each day. I'm like a wheat thresher. Watch your heads!

There is so much to do in the coming weeks and when I work through it, I always land at the day before Christmas, in a new house surrounded by boxes with no ham in the fridge and no tree and no presents and I feel a bit ill. Can someone postpone Christmas till mid-January?

Already I'm exhausted all day and awake all night going through lists and plans in my head. Ironic that I was like this in the lead-up to my wedding, hey, Spoutie? Timings and contingencies and delegating. We have a holiday next week. Last thing I bloody feel like with all else going on! I found myself declaring to Angelo over lunch yesterday, in my best organising voice, "Now, on this holiday, we have to make sure we relax. RELAX, OK?" Quick, have fun!

Ironically, I'm knitting through it all. Albeit, knitting with a panicked, manic gait, but knitting nonetheless.

See you on the other side!

swinging

The reason this task is so relevant this week (or last) is that in the history of knowing the 5 of us and ten years (times 5 ) of busy lives, this feels like the the most insanely busy period of big changes we are all going through.

So where am I at????

Do you remember the Billy Joel video clip of "We didnt start the fire", well my brain swings from that to being intensely present with the kids at the moment.

This parenting thing has left me many many times feeling out of control. But at the moment when I am with the kids (as I am 24/7, including much of the night) I feel really focussed. Is it because the glorious age of 4 has hit and it is laugh a minute with my once wildly spirited 2-3 year old. Or is it a new found inner peace with change?? Whatever it is, I am enjoying these days so much - New bikes, new teeth, scraped knees, chewing cords, less waking at night, up all night. But for some reason we are in a rhythm. Perhaps it is because we have no idea where we will be living in 6 weeks, Sydney, Singapore, Hong Kong, Sandy Beach. Who can predict what the great financial markets will do in a week, so perhaps the 4 of us are just in a rhythm of living this life as it is today, today.

And then I think about the logistics of this move and I tumble out of the present into the unknown, spending weeks of time on real estate websites, and spontaneously crying whenever I have to tell people we are leaving, blaming baby hormones still......

And then I think about Asia and this kingdom of paradox we have living amongst. Sydney feels too real life, too old life, too far away from the world. But Asia is so rife with corrupt governments and excessive capitalism and I long to bite into an apple that has only travelled 4 hours by road to get to the market. And I swing high and low from these realities. My kids are now more Honkanese than Australian, but I want them to be barefoot and salty, but I want them to be exposed to language and culture and I continue to swing........

And then I think constantly about the politics of war, this bloody war my brothers going off to fight in again. Nothing is black and white about it anymore. He told me that the word in the army is that these rouge Afghan soldiers who are shooting at our men are most likely being blackmailed by the Taliban and their families and children threatened..........and I cant fathom a world where this is possible. I swing...

So approaching mid thirties, unsure of which country I will call home in the next little while, I feel happy and ease with change and so grateful for my hub & kids. But Asia has left its mark, the world feels so much more complicated than before. So right now, where am I at..... I guess I feel like I am at the top of a mountain looking, waiting for the universe to stamp its thumbprint on me.

And can I just add how excited I am to be a part of my darling beautiful Spouty's wedding in 2 weeks and 5 days. And how when I think of her as a blushing bride I spontaneously burst into tears.....

and life is that beautiful

2 weeks and 6 days

Amanda - 'where are you at?'

2 weeks and 6 days until I am a bride. The thought makes me laugh, giggle, panic, breath a little deeper, smile from the inside out and want to cry with gratitude at the generosity and love of friends and family. As I go through the motions I would on any work day of putting together final timings for the day, making last minute phone calls to suppliers and planning our travel I have this tune in my head that keeps playing the words 'this is actually your wedding' over and over. We now have 140 people attending this beautiful day which in one moment feels insane and in another feels incredible. I feel so very humbled that so many people have chosen to say yes and not just yes but busting to celebrate with us. And then there's my divine husband to be who I am so in love with. Tim has been there every step of the way in the planning - in fact lets be honest - he's done a far better job in that department than me. You should see the wedding spreadsheet - I'm going to package it up and sell it to brides to be in future. Software for brides :)

So where I am at? I am happy, panicky, warm and fuzzy all over. I'm slightly stressed about work and what I'm leaving behind. I'm overwhelmed by what's ahead, not just the wedding but the flat renovations and the move that happens when we get back after Christmas.

Where am I at when it all boils down?

Grateful. Incredibly grateful. Thank you to my beautiful girls on this blog who I love so dearly and have been so present and there for me, not just now but since we very first met. Oh man I'm tearing up. I have so much thanks to give you girls and many. many hugs for everything you are doing for me at the moment.

LOVE YOU xoxoxo

TASK 40

Where are you at girls?

Ten adventures!

Kate - My top ten...

1) Start going to yoga again

2) Meditate daily

3) Plan a family holiday to a resort where we can swim to the bar

4) Go on a romantic date with my husband

5) Plan life in a new city, look up playgroups, cafes, yoga schools

6) Look into property market...find our family home

7) Sign up to facebook and join the rest of the world!

8) Find confidence in cooking again..care less and experiment more

9) Enjoy the daily rituals, find joy in the washing, cleaning and ordinary aspects of life

10) Absolutely embrace this new stage in our lives...Enjoy Hannah's naming day and thank all the people who have supported our new little family...Tell people I love them...drink it all in and laugh at the swooping bird, the rain or the little hiccups along the way!

11) P.S Try to not stress about move!!!! LAUGH and hassle hubby less!

12) P.P.S BLOG ON TIME NEXT WEEK!

XX

Write a list of ten things you could to do. Do the last thing on the list. - Aimee

1. Think about and plan Hugo's birthday party

2. Work out how to make a double decker bus cake for party

3. Talk Hugo out of Princess cake for Party (not that I truly mind, except it is a bloody hard fiddly cake)

4. Thing of de-cluttering the growing mass of toys in the living room whilst pondering why the smaller the child the larger, no the HUGER the toys need to be

5. Call montessori schools in Sydney and beg them to consider Hugo for 2012 intake, incase we are whisked home without notice.

6. Make missed dental, physio and DR's appointments for various family members

7. file the HUGE pile of papers in the my beautiful ceramic table bowl that was not intended to be a filing in-tray.

8. Look at flights/hotels for a last minute trip to Singapore that we are trying to make happen but I never seem to really look at flights because perhaps I believe it will never really happen and thus have not put it as number ten on this list because then I would be forced to make it happen.

9. Make dinner reservations for a group dinner this weekend, even though Scott is talking about Singapore this weekend, but I know it probably wont happen so I will go ahead and put this on the to do list.

10. Get out of this chair and put the m&m's packet in the bin, drink 3 glasses of water and GO

TO BED EARLY!

Oh shit I just re-read this task and realised it is ten things I could do rather than the list of ultra boring tasks of things I should do.

OK speed list of 'coulds' - Boracay, shave head and start my post baby hair again, start spec script and stop thinking about it, learn a language, plan a campervan holiday, guitar lessons, give up chocolate for the 3/4's left of November, buy nice underwear and wean myself of the comfy postpartum versions, beg husband to switch channels from Whitney and Kevin in THE BODYGUARD.

Ruey's 10 Things

1. Bake a cake

2. Go for a walk

3. Fly to France

4. Live in New York

5. Sing a song

6. Work on Spouty's wedding cabaret

7. Paint or draw a picture

8. Do my Reiki Meditation

9. Watch a movie

10. Dance in my living room.......

Well....I certainly did and still am! It's my first free weekend in ages and I decided to go beserk and jump around my living room full out with all my greatest dance moves ever. The feeling was totally shaking of the shackles of school life and enjoying the freedom!! What songs.....the first track was "Scratch My Back" by the one hit wonders "The Sharp"- sometime in the 80's. Followed by "Brass in Pocket" by the Pretenders....finishing with a bit of George Michael.....who is still playing.....and who I'm still dancing to in between writing this! Yeah baby....I've still got more dancing to do.....excuse me for a moment......!!

Amanda - 10 Things I could do...

1. Actually spend some time planning this wedding thats on in just 5 weeks
2. Write to my sister to find out where she is in India and when she thinks she might be gracing us with her presence again
3. Buy my sister a birthday present
4. Pack for my work trip to Sydney tomorrow
5. Contact my real estate agent to get him onto finding tradies to renovate my apartment in a few weeks time
6. Go to the gym
7. Call Aimee to find out when she's coming home so I can plan social activities for the end of the year
8. Finish writing the paper I was meant to do yesterday
9. Mark the student papers for the teaching I did last week
10. Bugger it all and get out into our first summer day in Melbourne. 30 degrees at last!!!

Sorry, was that blog meant to be along the lines of;

1. Plan my next trip back to Europe
2. A yoga retreat
3. facial and massage
4. an all day lunch
etc etc etc

I'm saving all that up to look forward to once I'm Mrs Amanda Jacobs - Ha.

TASK 39

Write a list of ten things you could to do. Do the last thing on the list.